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Siempre pensé en escribirte una carta. Me la imaginé de todas las formas: en forma de poema, en forma de puteada, en forma de tristeza, en forma de enojo. Esta carta no sé qué forma tendrá, pero sé que le escribo a la nada. Pasaron tantos años para los dos. A mi me pasaron por arriba la adolescencia, los bailes, el alcohol y las drogas, los amigos, los novios. Ya me atravesaron los poemas, los libros de los que tanto hablamos, la militancia, el feminismo, la tristeza. Ya pasaron sobre mí el liceo, la facultad, la ira, las muertes, la terapia. A vos no sé qué te atravesó. Solo sé que ahora terminas una botella de whisky en dos días, cambiaste los Nevada por el tabaco y las hojillas, cambiaste de amigos y tu pelo está más blanco. Y a mí esas cosas no me dan rabia. No me da rabia el paso del tiempo, ni que cada vez tomes más whisky. Me da rabia que pase el tiempo sin que hablemos de lo que nos tranca siempre el pecho y la garganta, que solo nos digamos “te extraño” por whatsapp después de tus cuatro vasos de whisky, ir a tu casa y que hablemos de libros, música y política como si fueran los únicos temas de conversación que existen. Que vos no me digas por qué elegiste esto y que yo no te diga todo lo que siento, todo lo que sufrí por la ausencia de un padre. Pero al final, lo que me explota adentro es que vos estás cada vez más viejo, y el tiempo nos sigue enterrando en el corazón las cosas por decir, y nos acostumbramos cada vez más a sentimientos entumecidos, y a veces me despierto con ganas de viajar doscientos kilómetros y romper la puerta de tu casa, sacudirte y gritarte y que el grito guardado te estalle. Pero mientras, el tiempo pasa.

***Compartí este artículo :)

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